I want YOU, ALL of you.
#Men
I believe we are more prone to love hard, and fall hard, when it comes to our women. This is especially true if we’ve found “the one” that makes our world go round. Truth is, we are definitely tough on the exterior, but not as tough on the inside and we allow our manly bravado to mask this fact, and I will be the first to admit this. We often times lead with our ego and allow our pride to overtake what we truly want in our relationships. We have got to do better and doing better begins with being honest with ourselves, and her.
I often speak about alignment when speaking of relationships because being aligned, or being on the same page with another person, is the starting point to having anything lasting. Do you and her like the same things? Do you all have similar interest? Do you have similar goals and aspirations? These questions are important and requires you to be completely honest with self, before you can be honest with her.
Honest Acceptance
A relationship works with two (2) people.
Let me say that again…
A relationship works with two (2) people.
Everything I am telling you in this post is irrelevant if the other person isn’t committed to the same ideals that you are. That’s why it’s called a relationship. The last time I checked it really isn’t that fun having relations with yourself, but I digress.
So to my point, it never works when one person has their own agenda which differs from what the two of you should be doing, together. So before we go any further…
1) Alignment
2) Honest Acceptance of the other person
If a woman is fully aligned to what you value most, and vice versa, the relationship will still have it’s challenges but it stands a better chance of long-term success. Success is what you want, right? Of course.
So, alignment first–because this comes from understanding the similarities that matter most to you, then, being honest in feeling as to whether or not you truly accept this person, both good and bad. Or in other words, Acceptance. Meaning, you take the entire package. You can’t pick and choose what parts of a person you accept and what parts you reject. Remember, no two individuals will ever be closely aligned 100%. We are all intrinsically different–or distinctively unique expressions of God. So in order for a relationship to work, and be long lasting we need two (2) people to be clear in both areas, alignment and acceptance.
Beliefs, ambitions, goals, and an individuals hierarchy of values do NOT have to be the same in order to have a long-lasting and fulfilling relationship. They only need to be complementary because no two individuals will ever be completely aligned in these areas. The goal is to find a partner that you align with in every area of your life as closely as possible, but to look for perfection in a partner is feat that will likely keep you single for a very long time. The happiest couples are those that accept the best and worse in the person that they are with. When you spend time with an individual long enough it sets the stage for you to get to know her better, take note that I said “spend time”. Finding a partner is a task, finding one that you are compatible with is a greater task but well worth the journey. So take time to get to know her and see her strengths and her flaws in plain view. In order to be successful with her, you have to accept her, as she is.
Stay in Love, and Peace
